I am a "better to ask forgiveness than permission" person.   Tempered by the realities of life--health, promises already made, some relationships, there isn't much that I think is impossible, even for me.  I didn't write my first book until I was 62 and didn't graduate from college until I was 66.  At this point I should confess my motivation for even pursuing a degree: jealousy.  Pure, simple flaming green jealousy.  All three of our sons had degrees, some of them post-graduate accomplishments and I wasn't about to go to my grave letting them get the better of their sweet, old mother!  (not many would describe me with those terms)

I did not begin my life as a risk-taker.  I began my life very frightened, insecure and dependent.  My mom was bi-polar and aggressively mean.  Her language toward me was full of negativity.  "You'll never amount to anything!"  "You'll never find a man who will stay with you six months!"  "I heard that mistake (on the piano).  Can't you get anything right?"  Even my piano teacher didn't believe in my future in music.  I well remember the day she told my parents that the best thing they could do was burn the piano as I would never become a pianist. (I was seven)

But, God had other plans.  Less than six weeks after that less-than-affirming statement from my instructor, my parents were asked if they would give their permission for me to accompany the junior-high school orchestra.  Because I was only seven I had to be accompanied down the long hallways to the junior high orchestra room where I played from manuscripts arranged for much older children.  That was the launch pad for a lifetime behind a keyboard.  Studio musician, church pianist, professional accompanist (my favorite), arranger, and I still play a little piano (no, not a "small" piano, I mean a play piano a little!).

About the business of never staying married?  Fifty-seven going on fifty-eight.

And I could go on, but it would look like sheer self-aggrandizement and I don't need to go there.

So, the reason for this blog today?  Waiting in a doctor's office today I heard a mom tell her little boy:  "You never play nicely with other kids.  You're gonna end up in jail before you're sixteen!"

Has anyone ever told you that you can't do something you really want to do?  Don't ever let another person's stupidity determine your destiny!!

I wonder if everyone feels as I do writing this first blog: awkward.  A very new friend has convinced me to begin sharing myself this way, and I am flattered by her confidence in me and the excitement she has brought to the project.

"i still plant flowers" is my way of saying that I believe in the future.  The words do not imply that I am a Master Gardener!  Far, far far from it.  If they could many a beautiful plant, either inside the house or outside in the window boxes would testify to my genuine ineptness at tending them well.  I count on Roy, the husband of 57 years, to protect them from me.  I actually walk around the plants in the house in order to respect their space.  Works for me.

I don't like flowers from other people's yards or gardens. And don't bother spending your hard earned cash on a bouquet from FTD.

I love flowers that grow around my house.  I knew those plants when they were little and scrawny and weak and their stems looked like they could never support anything of beauty or value and I wondered why Roy had spent good money on them.  I watched him feed them and water them and prune them and talk to them.   And so, when he brings in daisies or roses for me to enjoy, it is a true gift that I have not earned but treasure.

My life reflects a process much like our flowers.  My seventy-three years of life have taught me many things (and you'll read some of them here).  One of them is that it was wise, and safe to put my entire existence in the hands of The Master Gardener (God) as a young person.  I have spent much of my life foolishly trying to tell Him how to feed me, or water me and that I certainly don't need pruning!  But here I am, all these seasons later, a woman of some beauty and great value as a result of His care.

You won't read a whole lot of religious stuff here, but you'll be exposed to my opinions of what constitutes true spirituality.  I can't help it, it kind-of falls out of my mouth when I talk about most everything from grandchildren to cooking (at which I am less than gifted!).  

Finally, if you ever choose to post a comment I only have one request.  Be Gentle.  There is no way of knowing how much any of us have already been pruned today.